True
by FallenSwan
Summary: [Songfic]Starfire is determined to unleash the feelings that she had set aside--even if it means risking rejection from the one person who matters most.


**_

* * *

_****_TRUE_**

The sun rises to the eternal sky and I remove the blankets that had been smothering me through the night and throw them aside. It is as if my dreams have fired a sudden confidence or dire need to speak what my heart has been concealing for a long period of time now. I, Starfire of Tamaran, have never longed for something so strongly; so intensely that I could not push it aside. I stand and reach for the brass doorknob, my hands quiver with both excitement that I will see you this morning, and fear for what I have decided to do.

* * *

_I won't talk_

_I won't breathe_

_I won't move til you finally see_

_That you belong with me_

* * *

When I still resided in Tamaran, I caught conversations between the servants at the palace when still very young. I had thought it meaningless banter, harmless entertainment then--but now I realize what I had been far too young to understand. They spoke of brave knights and handsome men of the court--and yet I could not identify what quicken and shushed their voices when I would pass. Was I not meant to hear? I had wondered. I later confided this to Galfore and he merely gave me another smile and a soft pat me on my head. I still did not understand, but I knew then it was not the moment to learn of it.

It had been years and now is when I come to learn of it--when he without even knowing it--taught me. Robin had willingly taught me many earth customs, explained earthen creatures--and occasionally introduced to me to strange and delicious earthen foods such as the cotton candy that we had ate during our ride on the machine called the Ferris wheel. That is, before my sister had come and uncovered more of the canvas that would be finalized today. I remember as I saw her conquer Cyborg and Beast Boy's interest that jealousy and misery had sparked in me. It worsened when I learned that she had taken my only opening in my teammate, Raven, and her mysterious ways. At that moment I needed solace, and I sought him.

* * *

_You might think_

_I don't look_

_But deep inside the corner of my mind_

_I'm attached to you_

_Ooh_

_I'm weak it's true_

_Cause I'm afraid to know the answer_

_Do you want me too?_

_Cause my heart keeps falling faster_

* * *

A pain, not physical, but emitting from inside pierced me as I saw them. At the moment I had not known what they had been doing and as I had seen in earthen movies, what it seemed that they were doing shattered me completely. All I received in Tamaran that Blackfire had desired; fame, adoration, even what they call here 'fan clubs', I would have handed over immediately as I did not care for them. Blackfire knew exactly that the only thing that I could not throw away or give was my friends; or his affection. At that very moment I regretted every word, exclamation, and smile I had given her during my vivid description of Earth and my friends. I knew she enjoyed causing me pain, and admittance of that fact did not please me, but she had gone far too far.

* * *

_I've waited all my life _

_To cross this line_

_To the only thing that's true_

_So I will not hide_

_It's time to try_

_Anything to be with you_

_All my life I've waited_

_This is true

* * *

The one thing--or rather person, that I would give everything I had in exchange for---she could not take him away from me. I had quickly intervened and tried to brush my sister of as quickly as possible. The flame of jealousy died when I was successful only to re-ignited surprisingly vibrant during the time when I was attacked later that day._

* * *

_You don't know_

_What you do_

_Every time you walk into the room_

_I'm afraid to move

* * *

_

The same feeling consumed me when I had to tolerate Kitten---the most horrible, intolerable, person that I had thus far encounter. Seeing as my sister had betrayed and attacked me--that meant that what I felt for her was very close to the emotion of 'hate'. Yet I averted crossing that boundary and felt every fear of Robin even remotely liking this manipulative girl and I loosing him forever melted when I danced with him.

* * *

_I'm weak, it's true_

_I'm just scared to know the answer_

_Do you see me too?_

_Do you even know you met me?

* * *

_

The music, the lights, even the silly star and moon shaped decorations disappeared. It was only him that occupied every corner of my mind--nothing else mattered, no one else existed. A strong sense of belonging and being loved shot through me with such intensity that it slightly made me dizzy--but I will cherish that memory until the end of time.

* * *

_I've waited all my life_

_To cross this line_

_To the only thing that's true_

_So I will not hide, it's time to try_

_Anything to be with you_

_All my life I've waited_

_This is true

* * *

_

So I walk, barefooted, through the cold hallways of Titans Tower. Quickening my footsteps to reach the kitchen. Yet, as I am mere feet away I hesitate---I've come this far, but I wonder, will I have the courage to keep on?

* * *

_I know where I go_

_I'll be on my way to you_

_The way that's true

* * *

_

He greets me, his hair in a strange manner, aroused and almost _messy_. Something highly unlikely from the Robin that I have come to know and love so very dearly. He emits a small yawn and raises his hand in an earthen greeting.

"Morning, Star. I'm trying to look for something that's editable and not tofu for breakfast. Why are you up so early?"

I wish I could tell him that the reason why I wake every morning is to see him, just to catch a glimpse of time alone with him. But I do not instead I answer in a faraway manner and avert his gaze. My stomach churns and my hands turn as cold as the tiled floor.

* * *

_I've waited all my life_

_To cross this line_

_To the only thing that's true_

_So I will not hide, it's time to try_

_Anything to be with you_

_All my life I've waited_

_This is true

* * *

_

"Robin I---"

His gaze momentarily defocused immediately shines the spotlight on me. I feel that the entire idea of dispelling all lies has been a mistake. Perhaps I shall have considered my cowardice before I embarked on such a courages journey.

"Anything wrong Star, you seem a little down."

His gaze questions me and the pressure falls upon me without mercy. Without me seeing he walks closer to me and suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder. Sparks fly through my entire body. His warmth, even through his gloves, entering me. It is moments like these that drove me to this insanity.

"Robin, it is just, that I feel that, well--that I am so very fortunate to have such an excellent friend as you. I---"

I could not help it, and as I felt the hot tears riveting down my cheeks I feel embarrassment overwhelming me. It was all a mistake, a gigantic mistake.

I feel his arms around me and his breath tickles my ear.

"It's all right Star---you can tell me whenever you want to. I'll always be waiting for you, always."

I can feel one of his rare smiles and I catch it despite my tears. I had not realized that the hidden canvas had been on display for so very long.

* * *

_This is true...

* * *

_


End file.
